This is 44

I did nothing elaborate this year. No weekend trip to Berlin. No big orgy bash. Had dinner at The Little Door on Third Street in Mid City with Madd Sunday night. Tonight Gina is coming to take me to 71 Above. So no biggie.

A big thing I noticed this year is that my mental age is nowhere near my physical age. Physically I do feel 44. I’m thicker around the middle. Thanks to bouts of sciatica over the years, I have dead nerves in my left foot (meaning I have no feeling in parts of it.) It takes a little bit for my muscles and bones to stretch out and get me in motion.

But mentally, I still feel like I’m in my 20s. I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. I still hate and don’t trust anyone. I don’t want to share my bed with anyone. I hate vacuuming/sweeping/mopping.

So I’m 44. And I take solace in the fact that it can only go downhill from here.