Always a Bridesmaid

It’s happened again. “I absolutely cannot predict any type of future in terms of sexual interaction or romance, but I have to tell you that every time I talk to you I feel so calm and relaxed. There’s something comforting about you.” Never mind that I told him I like listening to Satanic music, that most people I know think I’m a cunt, that I don’t really conform to much of anything. That if I had more balls I would do porn, that sometimes I wish The Grandmother would pass so I can get on with my life. That most days I hate everyone in my family. That I do like watching sports and taunting the hell out of people. That sometimes I want to be slapped while being fucked so that I can slap and punch and choke right back. But no. I’m comforting. A teddy bear. *sighs* Always a motherfucking bridesmaid… To take solace I’m listening to a bunch of Coil and eventually I’ll have to edit the new podcast Brendan and I recorded earlier today. (I am sitting on the toilet in this picture.)