The Surface Beauty Belies

Cabin Fever

With The Grandmother not doing so hot recently, I found myself cooped up in the apartment trying to attend to her needs. Also she hates it when I’m not home, so I try not to get too far away. For example when I went to Portuguese Bend last week, she yelled at me when I got home because I was gone for two hours.

The problem is I can feel my body going down the tubes as I try to make her feel as comfortable as I can. I can’t do that anymore. I need to go out and get some activity into my inert life whether she likes it or not. So yesterday I went out to White Point and climbed up to the Battery, and today I went over to Ocean Trails. Man, it’s been a while, and I felt every step of it throughout my body.

Whatever. I will do what needs to be done, and ain’t no one is going to make me feel guilty about it. It’s bad enough I’ve sacrificed time with my friends to do this. It’s bad enough I’ve asked for help to give me at least a day a month off only to be rebuffed.

Fuck. Now I feel worse.

Well I suppose it’s time to fix up some dinner only to see it left uneaten.